Sigh.

Sigh. Why am I sighing.
Maybe it's because people don't believe in MA's mugging meetings.
At least I believe.

And I don't dare to talk to her..
Really..
I am afraid..
I don't know what to do..
Sigh.

Still remember, in my official blog
I said something like
我要把生活涂得多姿多彩
That's all shit.
SHIT.
Sigh.. I can't even try to go into my life myself.

I want to die.
REALLY!
I WANT TO JUST ESCAPE.
But I need to abide by the lifelong promise that I can't commit suicide.
Sigh.. What should I do now?